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GKN Weekly Update 8/28/12 – Who Is REALLY Asking The Questions?

Good morning, my fellow Earth-icans. Haroo!

First off, thanks to those of you who played in the sandbox with me at last week’s Edge Studio webinar. I know I’m crazy but I love talking about negotiating rates & invoicing. Mmm, spreadsheets…

For those of you who I haven’t talked to lately, this year I have discovered a fun, if not slightly bizarre, way of asking people questions. I’ve learned that when people, or at least I, ask somebody something, it tends to come from one of three sources:

1) Me

2) My Ego

3) The “14-year-old girl” in me

Yeah, I know # 3 sounds a bit strange, but let’s address them in order, shall we…?

1) Me

This is who asks a question when I have no ulterior motive. Stuff like “What time is it?” or when I have a sincere desire to help, listen, learn, understand, etc.

2) My Ego

This is who asks a question when I’m soliciting opinions, seeking praise, consolation, etc. Stuff like “So where can I see the video I just narrated?” or “Are there any reviews for my latest audiobook?” Yes, I want these things for my portfolio and so I can hear critiques so as to improve the quality of my work, but c’mon now.

3) The “14-year-old girl in me”

No, I don’t have any weird confessions to make! This is who wants to hear gossip, be catty, succumb to less mature impulses.

Maturity = Impulse Control and we all have impulses, believe me. The key to controlling your impulses is to have self-awareness so you don’t succumb to said impulses. One way to do that is to understand why you’re saying what you’re saying while you’re saying it! You’ll be surprised (and often disappointed) in what comes out of your mouth in front of certain people.

Here’s the other thing: most people know when you’re full of crap. They also know when you’re asking one thing when you’re getting at something else. So something I have been doing lately is announce which part of me is truly asking the question, often to comedic effect! “My ego wants to know where I can see the video I narrated”. I have said that to a few clients and I have ALWAYS gotten a laugh. I have also done this with friends & family when having serious conversations and it has been very helpful.

TIP OF THE WEEK: When you’re having a conversation with anyone, be it a friend, family member, or client, try to determine what your motivation is when asking questions. Developing that level of self-awareness whilst “in the moment” can provide some serious insight into your character!

QUOTE OF THE WEEK: Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has no heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains. Winston Churchill

STUFF!: I saw “Hondo” for the first time over the weekend.

Yes, I’m only 59 years too late, but I’m not a John Wayne fan so I thought I’d give it a try. I enjoyed it! I must say that even though John Wayne couldn’t act his way out of a wet paper bag, he had this, I don’t know, presence, and you can’t take your eyes off him! Marilyn Monroe had the same quality. Can you name any modern-day actors who have that quality?

From Tom Dheere’s apartment, this is Tom Dheere; GKN News…


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